Why Masking Is More Harmful Than Filtering at Work (And What It’s Costing You)
Back in 2017, I had a moment that changed how I showed up professionally. I was waist-deep in leadership studies, unraveling the difference between presence and performance—between surviving and being seen. It was in mud that I realized something that shook me: I had been masking for most of my career.
At first, I didn’t have the language for it. I thought I was just being “professional.” But over time, I saw the toll it was taking—not just on my energy, but on my sense of self.
Masking and Filtering Aren’t the Same Thing
Let’s jump off by breaking down a common workplace misconception. Many of us assume that editing ourselves for the office is just part of being an adult. And that’s true—to an extent.
There’s a difference between filtering and masking:
Filtering is when you choose which parts of yourself to share, based on context, boundaries, or strategy. It’s authentic self-management.
Masking is when you suppress or hide your identity, expressions, or emotions to avoid judgment or negative consequences. It’s self-erasure.
One is rooted in agency. The other is often rooted in fear.
What Masking Does to the Mind and Body
The psychological cost of masking is heavy—and it’s not just anecdotal.
Dr. Brené Brown, a leading researcher on vulnerability and shame, notes that “when we armor up against vulnerability, we shut ourselves off from the very connection and belonging we crave.” Masking, in many ways, is that armor.
Here’s what the research shows:
Increased burnout: A 2021 study published in Nature Communications showed that identity suppression (a form of masking) significantly increases emotional exhaustion in employees, especially among underrepresented groups.
Cognitive overload: Constantly monitoring how you’re showing up can lead to what’s called “emotional labor,” a concept first introduced by sociologist Arlie Hochschild. It’s like running mental antivirus software 24/7.
Mental health impact: A 2019 report from the American Psychological Association found that employees who mask aspects of their identity (e.g., neurodivergence, gender expression, cultural norms) reported higher rates of anxiety and depression.
Diminished performance: Amy Edmondson, in her research on psychological safety, found that teams perform better when people feel safe enough to speak up and be themselves—even if it means taking interpersonal risks.
In essence: masking helps us survive short term but limits our ability to thrive long term.
My Journey: From Masking to Filtering
Before 2017, I thought being a good leader meant keeping it tight. Polished. Unflappable. And if we can have a real convo, it meant mimicking the white male leadership teams that surrounded me. They were the primary dominant forces in the corporate space I moved through, so they set the cultures and what felt like the standards. In reaction, I was teaching, leading, coaching—and performing. But beneath that, I was editing parts of myself that didn’t feel “safe” to show: my doubts, my cultural lens, even my joy.
Through therapy, mentoring, and deep study, I learned to distinguish between what I chose to keep private and what I felt forced to suppress. That shift—subtle but powerful—changed everything.
I began to filter, not mask.
I still used discernment, but I didn’t shrink myself.
I set boundaries, but they weren’t based on shame.
I told the truth—even when it was messy, vulnerable, or countercultural.
The more I made peace with who I was, the less I needed to perform who I thought others wanted me to be.
Masking protects your image. Filtering protects your energy.
The Workplace Isn’t Neutral
Let’s keep it a buck… some workplaces reward masking.
You might have heard things like:
“That’s not professional.”
“Let’s keep it neutral.”
“Don’t bring your whole self here—just the parts that fit.”
But neutrality often serves the dominant group. It asks others to contort themselves into an acceptable version of humanity.
This doesn’t mean you should overshare or ignore context. But a workplace that punishes emotional truth or cultural expression becomes a breeding ground for disengagement, turnover, and mental fatigue.
Signs You Might Be Masking (Even If You Don’t Know It)
Here are a few signs that you may be masking at work:
You overthink how every message or comment might be received.
You avoid asking for help because it might “make you look weak.”
You feel emotionally drained after work even if the tasks weren’t demanding.
You laugh along with things that don’t feel funny—or stay silent in the face of bias.
You’ve ever said “that’s just how it is” when it didn’t sit right.
If any of these sound familiar, you’re not alone. Many of us learned these habits as survival strategies. But the invitation now is to ask: Are they still serving me?
What Filtering Looks Like in Practice
Filtering allows for self-expression with discernment. It’s the difference between:
Saying, “I’m good” by default vs. “It’s been a tough week, but I’m hanging in.”
Changing your natural voice to sound “less ethnic” vs. adjusting volume for a mic.
Avoiding honest feedback vs. offering it respectfully and clearly.
Filtering is a practice. It’s not about being “radically open” all the time—it’s about knowing that your wholeness is not a liability, but a leadership asset.
What Leaders Can Do to Support the Shift
If you’re in a leadership role, you help set the tone. Here’s how you can make room for filtering without forcing people to mask:
Model humanity: Share moments of vulnerability with discernment. When leaders normalize imperfection, others feel safer to show up.
Reward truth-telling: Don’t just tolerate candor—recognize it. Especially from voices who have historically been told to stay quiet.
Challenge performative professionalism: Ask, “Is this standard about excellence or about assimilation?”
Create room for check-ins: Build in space for people to express how they’re really doing, not just what they’re producing.
Closing Thought
The most transformative leadership shift I ever made didn’t come from a book or a framework—it came from choosing to stop hiding. The more I filtered with intention instead of masking out of fear, the more my leadership had texture. And depth. And resonance.
You don’t need to wear a mask to lead. You just need to be brave enough to show up without it. Then you can create space that invites others to take theirs off too.
*Ask yourself… what parts of yourself have you been masking in the name of professionalism—and what might happen if you started filtering instead?
